Merry Christmas

I hope that you are all getting ready to spend the holidays with those you love. We leave on Saturday (weather willing) for California. I'm nervous to fly with all of the snow we have been getting but I am really excited to see my family. Talk to you all after the holidays!

My Big Belly

So this is what 7 months pregnant looks like when you have twice the normal amount of amniotic fluid! I know I am huge and when people ask when I am due they are super shocked to hear that I still have 2 1/2 months to go but I still love the big belly!

Braylon

Is it me or are these ultrasound photos getting cuter?! Here is Braylon at the latest ultrasound last week. He weighed in at 2 pounds 13 ounces. Even though that sounds tiny to me the tech said that he is actually in the 60 percentile for weight/size right now. I guess that makes sense because we expect him to be a long baby like his daddy. Just 80 more days to go from today - holy moly!!!

This one's for Jeni

I know I promised nursery photos a while ago! I still haven't finished the mural (I'm such a slacker) so I was wanting to wait until it was done but I won't keep you in suspense any longer. Here is what the nursery looks like so far. Please don't mind the beer in the photo (boys will be boys)!

Also - I just got a call from my doctor's office and all of my tests came back just fine - yay!!!

Baby Update

Pregnancy can throw some crazy curve balls your way when you least expect it! I will start by saying that Braylon is doing good. I went in for a regular checkup about a week ago and had to take a test for gestational diabetes. I'm still waiting on the results of that so keep your fingers crossed for me that it turns out negative! In the meantime my doctor wanted me to take a couple of other tests because of some symptoms that I have been having that are out of the ordinary. The first was a 24 heart test because I have been having palpitations and feeling lightheaded and dizzy when they come on. My doctor thinks this is because of pregnancy hormones and a high level of adrenaline because of the pregnancy. The second was another ultrasound because at my 27 week appointment I was measuring 32 weeks!!! That is 5 weeks ahead of schedule! We went in for the ultrasound on Friday and found out that I am carrying almost twice as much amniotic fluid as normal! No wonder my belly is so huge! The tech said there was nothing to be concerned about but that when my water breaks it will probably be a spectacle! She also said that would explain why Braylon is so active - his pool is twice as big as the other kids' so he has a lot of room to move around in! The best part (other than knowing everything is okay) was being able to see Braylon again. He is SO cute!!! We could see his face pretty clearly and he was yawning and sticking his tongue out. It is amazing how precious a little boy can look in an ultrasound photo!

I am still not sleeping well but for some reason I have just learned to function anyway. I am just hoping right now that all of my tests come back okay and that our trip to California for Christmas won't be affected. I love this time of year and I am really looking forward to spending time with my family and friends back home. My girlfriends are having a baby shower for me while we are out there too and I am excited for that. It will be so nice to catch up with everyone and have a week off of work!

I will post the new ultrasound photo of Braylon as soon as we get it scanned! Happy Holidays everyone!

We have a name!

We finally have a name for our little guy! He will be Braylen Brant Vanous (or Braylon - we aren't 100% sure on the spelling!). I am so excited that we can call him by something other than little monkey! I think I am most happy about the fact that neither Andy or I feel like we compromised to make the other one happy. We both really love the name and are super excited to share it with everyone. Brant is after my brother so I am also really excited to honor him by giving my 1st son his name!

Braylen's nursery is almost finished too! I can't wait to post photos of the completed room. It is turning out even better than I imagined. I just can't believe that in about 3 months we will be using it! Wow - this whole pregnancy seems to have flown by. I feel really lucky that it has been uneventful so far. I feel good (for the most part) and I think Braylen does too. He kicks me ALL of the time! It is really awesome!!!

Say a little prayer...

...for my friends. In the last few days I have had 2 wonderful women in my life go through some really difficult times with their pregnancies and births. One lost both of her twin girls. The other's little girl has complications and has been admitted to the pediatric unit. It makes me so thankful for the fact that my little guy is doing well. I have been praying for them every day. It just sucks that such horrible things happen to such wonderful people. Sometimes God's plan doesn't make a lot of sense.

Presents!

My family is way too cute - especially my dad and my brother. They are so excited that we are having a little boy they have both been shopping for him. My brother has been online finding awesome onesies that only an uncle could pick out. They have hot rods and motorcycles on them - which I love (and my mom thinks are awful!). He also found the coolest baby blanket for our little guy. It has black faux fur (the photo shows leopard print) on one side and vintage tattoo print fabric on the other. It goes perfect with the tattoo art mural in the baby's room! I guess you can say that we aren't too big on the traditional decorating! Our little boy is going to dress like a little rock star and have a room to match.



And yesterday my BOB stroller showed up - compliments of my daddy!!!! The funny part is that my dad's name is Bob - so Bob bought the BOB! Too funny! I am so excited though - it is such an awesome stroller! I'm one of those people who LOVE getting presents almost as much as I love giving them to people so this whole process is pretty fun!

Name Wars

Okay... the word "wars" might be a little strong. Andy and I do not agree on our number one choices for a name. I have tried really hard to be open-minded and to give his number one a shot but I just can't do it. I really dislike it. He likes mine - just not as much as he likes his own! I never thought it would be this difficult to come to an agreement.

Before we found out that we were having a boy I only had girl names that I liked. There wasn't one boy name that got me excited. Now I have a boy name that gets me excited but I am having trouble getting the husband on my team! Ugh!!!

In case anyone would like to cast their vote - the names are Marek (pronounced like Eric with an "M") or Porter. I won't even try to sway you by telling you which one is my favorite. Just let me know what you think!

It's A Boy!!!

Yep - he is definitely a little boy - no mistaking it! I have to admit that I was shocked - I really thought I was having a girl - but I am so excited to be having a son! The ultrasound was amazing. He was moving around and sucking. We could see all 4 chambers of his little heart beating and he looks great. He is weighing in at 14 oz. right now! The tech said his measurements put him right on track with my doctors due date of March 1st.

Andy thinks I am being mean by saying this - but does anyone else notice a resemblance to Homer Simpson in this child's mouth area?! Seriously! I'm sure that he won't be born looking like Homer but this ultrasound photo is making me just a little nervous!

We spent the whole day (and night) on the phone with friends and family. Everyone is thrilled. Now we get to start the battle over names and circumcision - YIKES!!!

BIG week!

This is going to be such a great week for us! Today I am exactly 20 weeks pregnant which means I am halfway through my pregnancy! Wow. I can't believe that we are halfway to meeting our little monkey!

Wednesday is going to be a SUPER exciting day. The Petunia Pickle Bottom outlet sale starts on Wednesday :). I have a serious love of all bags. Andy has been making me wait until I was pregnant before he would let me buy a diaper bag. Now that I am pregnant I have been waiting for the outlet sale before getting one. Wednesday is the day. And even more exciting is that on Wednesday we have our ultrasound!!! With a little luck we will find out if we are having a boy or a girl! I could literally burst from the excitement!

Car Seat Cushions...

Check out this great little find! I thought I had seen it all - but this is brand new to me. You wrap it around the handle of the car seat so your arm doesn't hurt when you carry it. At www.lilypod.com!

The BIG ultrasound and our little monkey

My BIG ultrasound was just scheduled for next Wednesday! I can't wait to find out if we are having a boy or a girl! I found the cutest onesie the other day too! We have been calling the baby "monkey" for a while now and we love Paul Frank clothing for babies. I think I might have to buy this even if it is a girl! Fauxhawks ROCK!!!

Do Unto Others...

I'm always amazed at how life's journey brings new friends my way. I started reading as many "adoption blogs" as I could find when Andy and I were told we might not be able to have a biological child. Now that I am pregnant I have met some great ladies who are also expecting through this crazy world of blogging. Some of the people who write those blogs have become amazing influences and inspirations for me over the past year. I would like to introduce you all to one in particular - her name is Steffany.

Steffany and her husband recently adopted twins from Ethiopia. Her journey to bring her children home and get them healthy is an amazing story that I think everyone could benefit from reading - but it is not the real reason I want you to know about her. While she was in Ethiopia she met a woman named Gadese. Gadese is an ex-Olympic athlete who was hit by a car and can no longer run. She and her husband lost their first baby when she was 8 months pregnant and developed pre-eclampsia. They are now expecting their 2nd baby and they were terrified about losing it as well. Steffany and her family (with the help of another family) decided to bring Gadese back to the United States for the remainder of her pregnancy to make sure that she had good healthcare and to give her baby the best start possible. Talk about an amazing family!

Here is a little something that Steffany has to say about Gadese: "She is such a strong and courageous woman. I am learning so much from her. Imagine flying across the world with someone you don't know, who doesn't speak your language. Leaving your family, country, the man you love for a chance to give life to your unborn baby. Imagine the strength of her husband to ask a stranger in a different country that speaks a different language to take your wife home for the chance to give life to your unborn baby. Now imagine being the one blessed enough to call this couple your family."

I can't image losing a baby - especially at 8 months. I can't imagine the things that Gadese and her family struggle with on a day to day basis. I am so lucky to have the life that I do. Gadese is due to give birth soon and she will be returning to Ethiopia with her baby so that her family can be reunited. She and her husband not only take care of her sisters but they also have two "adopted" children they took in whose parents died of AIDS. They don't have much and they struggle to survive. With Steffany's permission - I have decided to collect whatever useful items I can for Gadese to take back to Ethiopia with her. If you have any clothing or baby items that you are no longer using and would like to send them to me to include in the care package please let me know. Steffany has said that anything and everything can help.

If you would like read about Gadese and Steffany (and see pictures of their beautiful families) you can go to http://toliveloveandlaughtoday.blogspot.com/.

If you would like to email me for information on where you can mail items - I'm at kamisparks@yahoo.com

Exciting Stuff

So last night the baby was kicking hard enough for Andy to feel it for the 1st time! He was so excited! I love that I can share the baby's movements with someone now.

We are going to celebrate this weekend by going on a date to Telluride. As sad as this is to admit - I have never been! I have lived here for almost 5 years and still haven't found the time to drive over. This should be the perfect weekend because all of the fall colors here are starting to change. It should be beautiful. We are going to wander around town and the village and have a nice lunch or dinner over there. I'm really excited!

He's gonna be a soccer playa... he is!

Or maybe "she" - we still don't know. But on Monday the baby kicked me for the 1st time! It was so amazing! I have been feeling faint movement for weeks but as of this week it is getting much stronger and more frequent. Andy can't wait until he can feel it too!

Help Me!

I live in Durango, CO. Durango is kind of in the middle of nowhere. There is a very real possibility that I will have to register for my baby without ever being able to step into a baby store (sad but true). You can only get so much information online... so I am asking for help from the experienced. If you have any recommendations on items that you couldn't live without when you had your kids (or things that you never ended up needing) I would love some advice. Thanks!!!

Baby's 1st Pictures

We got to see the baby yesterday! The ultrasound tech got some awesome photos but this is one of my favorites...


It is so amazing to actually be able to see our little one moving around inside of me. I fall more in love everyday...

Coolest Thing Ever!

Today we got to hear the baby's heartbeat! It was seriously the coolest thing ever! I have never seen Andy smile so much before. We were both absolutely amazed. I am so renting a doppler so we can listen to the heartbeat at home!

Letter to the Baby

Dear Baby,

You don’t have a name yet. Your dad and I don’t even know if you are a boy or a girl. It is hard to explain how I am feeling (and you might not really ever understand until the day you become a parent). Even though we haven’t met you and we don’t know if our future will be full of Hot Wheel’s or Barbie’s – I have never been more in love with someone in my whole life. And that someone is you.

I fell in love with your dad almost 8 years ago. In fact it will be 8 years in less than a month – on September 1^st. But the love I feel for you is so different. You are a part of both of us and right now you are growing away inside of me. Being pregnant with you is by far the coolest and most amazing thing I have ever been able to experience. I feel so lucky to be the mom because I am the one who gets to carry you. Not that you have made it all that easy on me – you haven’t!

Your dad and I were so excited when we found out that we were having a baby. Suddenly nothing else in the world mattered. Even though we planned having you – we never planned on how wonderful and overwhelmed with excitement we would feel when you became a reality. I feel so lucky because in addition to falling in love with you – I am falling in love with your dad all over again too. He already loves you so much too – he talks to you, kisses you goodnight every night and tells you that he loves you. I hope that one day you get to experience a relationship with someone that is as precious as the one that your dad and I have.

I want you to know that even before you were born I knew how special you would be. We created you with the hope that you will be the best person you can and that you will bring something amazing to this world that didn’t exist before you. My hope is to always be there for you, always love you and to give you the knowledge, guidance, and strength that you need to become whatever makes you happy. I can’t wait to find out if you are a boy or a girl but I am finding patience and trying to enjoy every moment that passes. After all I only get to be pregnant with you for another 6 ½ months.

All my love,

Mama

Holy Mother!

As much as I have been hoping I really wasn't expecting this to happen so quickly...


Yep. I am officially knocked up!!! I have been feeling so many emotions since we found out. What surprises me the most is that I mostly feel content and peaceful. It feels like everything just fell into place and this is the right thing to be happening at the right time. I admit that was a little disappointed when our doctor told me I might have limited time left if I wanted a biological child and we decided to put our adoption plans on hold to try to conceive. There will always be a part of me that would have liked to adopt first - that is the way my parents did it. I also never thought that I would get pregnant on the 1st try and was worried that it would be a really long time before I was a mom. I guess I can throw that worry out the window now. I'm due the 1st of March and as excited as I am to meet my baby I think I am going to like this whole pregnancy thing. Don't get me wrong - these 1st few weeks haven't been a walk in the park by any means. I just want to enjoy the whole process (even the painful parts) because it is such a miracle and I feel so lucky that I get to experience it all - good and bad. I think the end result will be worth it. :)

Summers coming...

It has been sooo long since I have written anything. Even though I religiously check up on all of those blogs I love to stalk (I mean read) I haven't taken the time to write anything myself. Things are so busy but I don't feel like any of it is really worth writing about. We are re-financing our house but that really isn't fun to talk about. I finally went out with my friend and took some fun shots of the gorgeous flowers down by the river this weekend.


I am so excited to be getting back into my photography. It makes me feel so much more complete when I am taking pictures. Once the re-finance is done on the house I am going to buy Photoshop so that I can start having some fun with editing and schedule some real photo shoots. I really like to do portraiture and I even have a new friend in town who is going to let me photograph her family. I met her when I was researching adopting from Ethiopia. She lives here in Durango and has two fabulous kids from Ethiopia. I am hoping that I can have an actual photography business established in the next year so that I can grow it and I can be a work at home mom when we have kids. I would also really love to be able to join an organization called Celebrating Adoption. If you haven't heard about it you should check it out. It is a group of professional photographers who volunteer their time and expertise to do free family portraits for families who have adopted a child within the last year. Durango doesn't have a photographer involved in the organization so I think it would be really exciting to be the first one down here!

Brothers...

My friend's brother died last weekend. My heart broke for her and her family and it really got me thinking how much I love my brother. He is freaking hysterical. Here is a photo of him pretending to read the paper on the hospital "toilet chair" last year when my dad was really sick.

I decided to write him an email this afternoon to let him know I was thinking about him. It was kind of a cop-out because I knew if I called to tell him I would end up crying. Here is what I wrote:

"One of my best friend's in Durango just lost her brother over the weekend. He was only 23. It made me realize that I probably don't tell you how much I love you or how important you are to me often enough. I know you know that I love you (and I know you love me too) but you can never really hear this kind of stuff too much right? You are the best big brother a girl could ask for. Of all of the people in the world who's opinion I care about and whose approval I seek - you are at the very top of the list. I just wanted to make sure you knew that. On that same note - I know that you saw my haircut and that you hate it (I actually thought about you giving me a hard time before I cut it) so feel free to call me names and make fun of me - it is part of why I love you :)"

Life is really short and you never know when it is going to be too late to tell the people you love how you feel. My brother has always been there for me. From staying up together on Christmas Eve when we were little and talking all night long because we were too excited to fall asleep to leaning on each other through my dad's struggle with a kidney disease. He even named my oldest niece after me. He gave her my middle name (Denay) for her middle name. The poor child got more than just my name though - she also got my chopped off "Flintstone's feet".


I can't wait to have a son so that I can return the favor by naming him after my brother Brant. I will let you go now so that you can go tell your brother (or sister) how much you love them :)...

This is what happens when I get bored...

I cut 10 inches off of my hair yesterday after spending over 3 years growing it out!!! This is the kind of thing I do when I start to get bored. Now that I don't have any hair to cut off I will have to dye it a crazy color next time I start to get antsy!

Moving and babies...

When we decided to move to Durango from Southern California 4 years ago it was the hardest decision I had ever made - leaving my family, friends, career, the beach, In-N-Out Burger (you get the idea). The reason we gave it up was to give Andy a chance to get his career rolling and because it gave us a real chance at me being a stay at home mom. The quality of life that we could have by me staying at home while our kids are young was my number one priority. I know how hard it is and what kind of sacrifices most people have to make to be able to pull off living on one salary in this day and age. A lot of people don't even have the option - they simply can't afford to stop working. I feel really lucky that Andy and I have found a couple of options to make it happen. So... we are deciding between 1. trying to re-finance so that we can keep the house that we live in now - the house that we love, the house that we first met each other at and the very same house that we moved into together when we got married or 2. moving into a brand new house about 20 minutes outside of town (where it is much less expensive to buy) so that we can pay off all of the debt we have and afford to live on one salary. I am actually making one of those lists that show all of the good reasons to move on one side and all of the bad reasons on the other! Regardless of what ends up happening I finally feel content knowing that I will be able to be a stay at home mom (hopefully sooner rather than later!).

On the adoption front Andy & I decided to try to have a biological child before we start the adoption process. I really wanted to adopt before we have a biological child but the doctors have said that if we want biological kids that we shouldn't wait any longer to start trying so... If I don't get pregnant pretty soon I think we will go ahead and start the adoption paperwork because I am just not willing to wait that much longer to be a mom! It makes me nervous that wait times for the Ethiopia program we are interested in are increasing and I wish we were already a part of the process but I am trying really hard to practice being patient! I feel like I am starting to ramble so I am going to leave you with an inspirational quote that I received a little while ago from a friend:

A goal or a dream that doesn't challenge the dreamer to become more than they've ever been, to go where they've never gone, or to feel things they've never felt, is actually like wishing for a giant "life snooze button."

It's time to wake up people!!!

Peas on Earth - Happy Earth Day!!!

It IS easy being green! Here are some easy things you can do today and everyday to help protect our planet for future generations:

1. Reduce - Reuse - Recycle!
2. Don't be wasteful.
3. Turn lights off if you aren't in the room.
4. Join a local "freecycle" group - exchange items you aren't using and get things you want instead of throwing things away.
5. Purchase green energy.
6. Open windows instead of turning on the A/C.
7. Reuse paper that has only been printed on one side.
8. Go buy a cool Sigg or Nalgene bottle instead of buying bottled water.
9. Use cloth instead of paper towels and real utensils and plates instead of disposable.
10. Carpool or ride your bike to work!
11. Share your green ideas with others!

Alligator wrestling

I was just thinking that it has been almost one year since Andy and I took our honeymoon to Costa Rica (of course we had been married for 3 1/2 years when we finally got around to taking the honeymoon). If you have never been to Costa Rica - I have to say that it is one of the most amazing countries in the world. I am SO in the mood for another vacation to somewhere tropical. I am a beach girl and I am really missing the warm weather and ocean after this long, snowy winter.

The whole reason that I decided to write this post was to share the following amazing photo with you. Andy actually wrestled an alligator in Costa Rica.


Okay - so maybe it was only a fake alligator submerged in the shallow end of our hotel's swimming pool - but still. I was impressed. I laughed so hard when I came across this that I had to share it with everyone. I think he was pretending to be Adam Sandler in Happy Gilmore when he beats up the alligator to get Chubb's hand back.


Costa Rica was so magical - I can't wait to go back one day! I guess for now I will just have to start planning our next vacation to tide me over! Any suggestions?

Cutest Husband Ever

The other day Andy told me that the only combination better than peanut butter and chocolate was him and me. Could he be any cuter?

I'm A Little Nervous...

I left my dogs inside my house this afternoon... loose in my house. I know that from their photos on the right side of my blog they look as if they would NEVER do something bad while being left alone in my house - but don't let those sweet faces fool you. Actually, Tanner probably never would do anything bad. He really is the good boy. Gage however is a whole different story. If that guy hadn't written the book "Marley & Me - life and love with the world's worst dog" I could have written a book called "Gage and Me". The ONLY difference in this book would be the fact that Marley was a yellow lab and Gage is a chocolate lab. I'm not kidding - that would be the only meaningful difference. Please don't get me wrong - I love this dog as if I actually birthed him. I always tell people that if I had the chance I would push him out of the way of oncoming traffic and get hit myself before I would let anything bad happen to him. (I also tell them how much easier my life is going to be when he is gone.) Gage is the kind of dog that will destroy things just to piss you off. And when he destroys things he usually destroys expensive things. Here is a sampling from his 4 short years on this planet... prescription eyeglasses, an 8x10 area rug, the living room curtains, an Ipod, a $200 remote control, the front windshield of a car (seriously - he shattered it with his head), countless throw pillows, a quilt from Pottery Barn & too many fence planks to count (we probably could have built a brand new fence). Now look back at that sweet face to the right. You probably think I am making all of this up because he is so darn precious looking. Most people would have sent this dog packing. Instead I spend $186 every 28 days for the injection that keeps him alive (he has Addison's disease) and let him sleep in my bed with me. The things we do for love... I wonder what will be destroyed when I get home today?

Lucky Girl

I just got back in Durango after a weekend adventure with two of my best (and oldest) friends in Santa Fe. We realized this weekend that we have been friends for 20 years! Seeing as how we are only 30 years old - I think that is pretty impressive! They are so much more than "friends" at this point. They are absolutely family. They are my sisters. We have been through so much together since we first met. We spent the whole weekend relaxing and talking (maybe drinking a little too much - Damn Courtney and her "Margarita Tour through Santa Fe") It was just what I needed to help restore some balance after the last few crazy months. They always know exactly what to do and say to get me to laugh (we usually make a huge joke out of everything going on in our lives). I'm so thankful to have such great people in my life. I truly am a lucky girl.

One Day At A Time

Life can be such a whirlwind. Sometimes I actually have to stop and remind myself to slow down and take things one day at a time. For someone who admittedly has no patience that is not always an easy thing to do. I think it is important to try to not get so caught up in all of the planning for the future that you miss out on the right now though. I found out yesterday that my odds of still being able to have a baby are really good. The doctor also said that we should start trying ASAP to give me the best chance possible. I'm so excited about starting the adoption process though that I really want to do both at the same time. Unfortunately, I just found out that if I get pregnant before our adoption is complete then we have to wait until our biological child is 1 year old before we can continue the adoption process. Why can't life just be easy? Why can't I just have my cake and eat it too? So now we need to make some decisions about how to handle all of the potential "what ifs" involved and decide whether we want to wait to start the adoption process or take the risk of being in the middle of the process and deal with having to put it on hold if I get pregnant before it is completed. I have faith that it will all work out... I just still need to find the patience to deal with waiting to see how it will all work out. I'm like one of those horrible kids that you see reading the last page of a new Harry Potter book in the middle of the book store on the day that it first comes out because they can't wait to read the whole book. Okay maybe I'm not that bad :)

I Just Found Fried Chicken In My Purse...

I think that finding 3 day old fried chicken (thankfully in a ziplock) in my purse says something about my where I am at mentally right now. Truthfully it probably says more about my organizational state - but anyone who knows me knows that when my life isn't organized it means that something is off. I have so many things that I am excited to get started on: my photography business and starting a family to name the big one's. It just feels like everything is in limbo right now. I know that I don't have control over everything that is going on and I can't just snap my fingers or click my heals and make my dream child appear before me and make my photography business be flourishing enough for it to be my only job (I know this because I have tried that whole snapping your fingers/clicking your heals thing and it really only works in the movies). I do have faith that everything happens for a reason and that what we are going through right now is teaching me to have the patience that I will need to get me through the process of adopting.

On a really happy note - TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING!!! I might have lived in Colorado for the last 4 years, but there is still California blood running through these veins! I am SOOO ready for summer and sunshine, sitting on my deck and drinking a glass of wine after work and finally being able to wear my flip flops to work again (yes I am allowed to wear flip flops to work - how cool is that?!). I even wore a really "springy" top to work today to encourage Mother Nature to bring on the great weather. Happy Spring everyone!

Blogger Virgin No Longer

So this is what it is like to post a blog! I decided to create this blog after furiously researching adoption and reading blog after blog of families who are at some point in their adoption process. I guess I never really even considered having a blog (probably because I never felt like I needed to say anything). Now I do. I actually need to say so much that I don't even know where to start. As I write this I am waiting for test results to see if I still have a chance of being able to carry a baby and whether or not their is major surgery in my near future. After more than 2 weeks of waiting for these elusive test results I have actually found some peace with the "worst case scenario" which oddly enough doesn't seem like such a terrible "scenario" after reading so many inspiring adoption blogs. I have actually always wanted to adopt. My oldest brother is adopted. I always thought that it was a very cool thing for my parents to do and that it made my brother extra special. After a few weeks of research I feel very drawn to international adoption - specifically Ethiopia. In fact, the weirdest thing ever happened to me while I was researching Ethiopian adoption. I logged on to Yahoo Travel to research a flight for someone at my office and the featured travel destination of the day was Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Too weird! I had never even heard of Addis Ababa before beginning adoption research. If that isn't a sign... I don't know what is!

So this blog will hopefully serve as a little extra free therapy for me (on top of what my wonderful friends have already provided) as Andy and I start our family and re-prioritize our lives. (Funny how scary medical problems make you re-think your priorities in life, huh?) I feel like I have already made some great friends through this crazy world of blogging and I can't wait to make some more.